Randy | December 22, 2012
“The worst gift is fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.” ~ Johnny Carson Here in Canada, fruitcake is a staple of this season, less often eaten as a dessert than as a point in itself. Much maligned by its detractors, I feel a […]
Randy | December 21, 2012
Beginning today and running up to include New Year’s Eve, this will be the first in an eleven part series of articles in which I will make personal observations on the season of Yule as I have come, and am still coming, to know it. With those words a year ago, I ended my […]
Randy | December 12, 2012
Today’s Worldly Wisdom Wednesday has been delayed for special treatment thanks to late breaking events, so to give you something fun to do while you wait, I want you all to learn this song.
Randy | December 8, 2012
If you spend more than five seconds next to a camp fire, you already smell better than anyone who hasn’t, and you’re painfully aware that you’re just your next shower away from ordinary. But fear not! Salvation is at hand, brought to you by Campfire Cologne. Serendipity brought this to my attention today. Priceless.
Randy | December 5, 2012
Here’s a thrilling little ditty that’s as unsafe for work as you can get at this hour of the day. Yes, writers are sexy. You’ve seen my Wife – I’m living proof! That’s why writers write – because we can’t contain all the sexy, even during sex! Here’s Rachel Bloom in the official music video […]
Randy | December 1, 2012
Before the foppery of fashion that surrounds us today there were old standards that stood the test of centuries. Most notably, the codpiece and the cloak. The latter is our subject today, presented by lindybeige as part of his A Point About series. If your accessory list for a night on the town includes daggers […]
Randy | November 7, 2012
In addition to the immortal maxim that you must never knowingly sleep with anyone crazier than you are, there’s this to consider. Bed Time By LFM Neither a fight nor a conscience belong in your bed. Ask forgiveness instead of permissions. Eschew deep discussions too near to lights out, And avoid all nocturnal admissions.
Randy | October 25, 2012
I haven’t mentioned him in this year’s series, so I’m dedicating today’s bit o’ work to my old and recently promoted crime scene investigator Friend, Martin. I’ve spoken of him before as far back as Day 3 of DS 2010, and he’s the subject of my poem Crime Scene Man. I stand by my initial […]
Randy | October 19, 2012
Dead Eye Dick By LFM A necrophiliac desires Coitus with the dead. None that breathes will float their boat, At least, that’s what I’ve read. Some enjoy more “gamey” fare While some prefer it “fresh”, And some use oily marinades To … lubricate … the flesh. As open minded as I am, This doesn’t work […]
Randy | October 13, 2012
This poem has been marinating for a while. It came to be from observing the self inflicted misery of several people – two in particular – and is presented here by special request from Mrs. LFM. I can deny her nothing. Suffice it to say that we’ve all met people who bring ugliness into the […]