The Earwig Song
Posted By Randy on April 12, 2021

Source here.
The first song by a Canadian to sell more than one million copies was born out of a simple, beautiful moment in the life of an ailing child.
(There’s a) Bluebird on Your Windowsill was written by Vancouver nurse (Carmen) Elizabeth Clarke in 1947, who worked at what was then called the Hospital for Sick and Crippled Children (now the Children’s Hospital) in Vancouver. ~ Canadian Songwriters Hall of Fame
Recorded by such notables as Wilf Carter and Doris Day, my version of the song tells a story of youthful affectation and Fatherly travail. So now, with apologies to all who have gone before, here is …
The Earwig Song
By LFM
There’s a Horsefly on your windowsill,
There’s an Earwig up your bum,
So now you’ve got to tweeze it out
With your pointer and your thumb.
Oh sure it’s gonna pinch you bad,
But that don’t matter none,
Nobody else here likes backdoor bugs,
Son, you’re the only one.
I warned you once, I warned you twice
‘Bout sleepin’ on your knees.
Both buttons wore off your trap door
It’s flappin’ in the breeze.
You promised you would heed my words
But oh my boy you’ve sinned,
With an open invitation and
Your butt hole suckin’ wind.
There’s a Horsefly on your windowsill,
There’s an Earwig up your bum,
So now you’ve got to tweeze it out
With your pointer and your thumb.
Oh sure it’s gonna pinch you bad,
But that don’t matter none,
Nobody else here likes backdoor bugs,
Son, you’re the only one.