The Large Fierce Mammal’s Small But Weighty Book of Etiquette
Posted By Randy on November 27, 2011
“In considering how much you should care about the reaction of another to your own behaviour, it is always best to assume that they are armed, lethally skilled, and prepared to kill you at the slightest provocation. If the desired outcome of your course of action outweighs that risk, then you must proceed without delay; otherwise, rethink your dedication to it.” ~ The Large Fierce Mammal’s Small But Weighty Book of Etiquette, Volume 1
Source: http://www.victorianalady.com/newvictorianlifestyle.html
When I go abroad in the land, it never takes long to encounter so many examples of the decline of good manners that it becomes taxing to divine which represents the most dire specimen on any given day. Many decry such backsliding as an ailment of youth, but nay to that say I, for I commonly observe such reprehensible displays committed by those of equal or greater antiquity to my own, and I can remain silent no longer.
Let this be a warning to all that Volume 1 of The Large Fierce Mammal’s Small But Weighty Book of Etiquette will soon be made available as an ebook from this very venue. It will present illustrative examples taken from the wild, educational anecdotes, guidance in avoidance of committing the provacative faux pas, as well as recommendations for dealing with it as recipient, and leave no stone unturned in its revelations of proper conduct spanning all areas of social intercourse.
While I turn my attentions to assembling the promised tome, I will leave you today with a film clip that beautifully illustrates the spirit of this endeavour. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present the theatre scene from the 1950 motion picture Cyrano de Bergerac starring José Ferrer in the title role.
I was unable to play the clip with audio. However, I agree with the gist of these remarks. As a matter of fact I even once considered starting a “school of etiquette” whereby I would teach young people manners and social conduct not only at the dinner table but in social conductivity. Then I don’t know who or how many would actually register ? I agree wholeheartedly and see so often the disregard even when walking in front of you at the grocery store…do you often hear “excuse me”..no, not at all. What the hell has happened to “good manners” ? Bravo!
Oh Leroy, that clip without sound loses the entire point! It’s a classic.
The society we live in now is the result of several generations that have been permitted to grow up in a world without responsibility or consequence – a slippery slope, for the ability to embrace and manage both, with passion, grace, and panache, is not just a quaint throwback to an earlier and more romantic age.
Well Mr. Hearn, you succeeded in teaching at least one young person manners. Chris was THE most polite, well-mannered boy in our class. Quite possibly in our school. Which no doubt was partly why he was voted as both Junior AND Senior class president.
You have a lot to be proud of!
And it’s never too late to start that school… maybe a joint venture…? 😉
A joint venture indeed!
We’ve noticed this trend here in the Northeast US for quite some time. Holding doors for people who simply walk through without a nod or word of thanks……WTF? Aggressive drivers, etc., etc. In my opinion, it all boils down to a sense of “entitlement”–these people simply see the world through the eyes of “me, me, me”. It has become so bad that I don’t believe it will ever change for the better; courtesy, respect, honor and the like have become unimportant to the masses, or so it seems.
When we drove from Florida back up to New Jersey a couple of years ago, we noticed far more politeness, friendliness and courtesy in the Souther USA. The Northeast has always had the reputation for being unfriendly, but growing up here and spending most of my life here, I guess I had become numb to it. Someday we hope to be living in the West or even the South–seems like the more people who are crowded into an area, the less manners. Have you folks noticed this as well?
Always loved Cyrano de Bergerac, of course the Jose Ferrar one being my favorite. Not long ago the role was done by Kevin Kline, and I watched it expecting very little. What a surprise! He really did a great job on that version–as good or better than Jose Ferrar.
Great writing, thanks Randy
Thank you for your observations Gary.
Way back before we had the internet to blame things on, there were still self-important assholes and people who, for assorted reasons, went through life in a cloud of entitlement as often as not motivated by growing up wealthy and leveraged by family connections. Since the invention and widespread use of the automobile, there have been people who felt emboldened by its anonymity and speed to yell insults and improprieties, even to lob missiles, at people on the street. Now we have the internet with its persistent air of faux anonymity, and what gets hurled there has direct parallels to what happened with the automobile.
I grew up in a small Nova Scotia town, but most summers until I was 17, I spent visiting my maternal Grandmother in Montreal which was then the largest city in North America. I learned from that experience that small towns are not actually friendlier – they just contain a different kind of rude that isn’t usually aimed at people who come to visit. Hence, the mythology that rude doesn’t live there.
Diana,
I would suggest that your generous words of praise similarly match your beauty. I’m sure that my son’s manners were equally matched by your gracious presence otherwise they would have gone unnoticed. Thank you so very much for your thoughtful remarks.
Joint venture may well be worth pondering ! Thanks, Leroy.
You are a smooth man of impeccable taste Leroy, and I would be more than open to that joint venture.
[…] (predominantly poetry embellished with appropriate art work and previously unpublished material), The Large Fierce Mammal’s Small But Weighty Book of Etiquette, and an as yet untitled piece on the subject of ethics in hunting and gathering as done the LFM […]
[…] never seem to fully grasp. In fact, I am including an entire chapter on the subject in my upcoming The Large Fierce Mammal’s Small But Weighty Book of Etiquette – Volume 1. Recently, and much to the chagrin of some, we announced a long planned, slow but steady withdrawal […]